Live. Just live.

Today went by so fast that I didn't notice the time so much. I was actually enjoying my training/seminar at the downtown area today. There were only three of us who attended the training without so much as a companion. Everybody had a friend or were with their barkada today. Imagine that. I felt so lonely at the start of the day. As the instructor began, we were already laughing. I thought he was a serious man. He was the funniest without a hint of corniness. I enjoyed every minute of it. Well, there were moments when he would ask questions and although he said that he wouldn't let us explain or whatever, I would hide myself at the back of the person sitting in front of me, like I always do when I do not have any idea what the person in front was saying. haha I am such a coward.

Anyway, it just feels so good to review some of the basic procedures I've learned in college. Come on, not everyone remembers every single step or how a cravat or bandage should be applied. In all honesty, I graduated from Cebu Doctors' University without so much as learning how to make a square knot. Sad, right? BUT. I know how to make one now and I relearned how to apply bandage in almost all the parts of the body. You know, that moment when the instructor was on the first step and then you just remembered everything you learned and you just applied it right then and there without waiting for him to tell everyone the next step, that was EPIC. I felt so smart. And then I tried to release the square knot and boom. it got stuck. Man, that was EPIC, epic FAILURE. haha but my partner was nice enough to turn around and just manually untie it. LOL

And before I knew it, the day was over. Oh how I was scared to go out of the building and walk to the jeepney stop. It's like a 7-minute walk and I am just petrified of the possibility of having my bag snatched again and yes, of crossing the scary pedestrian lanes of Colon St. I don't know but I just get nervous and extra guarded there. I tell you, the downtown area has a LOT of people. You just don't know who to trust really.

As I was walking, I saw women wearing pekpek shorts and (oh there you are camel toes) they were actually sleeping on cardboards on the floor outside of what used to be a cinema. Really? They looked like they were drunk as hell the previous night and just forgot to go home or they didn't earn enough money for taxi or jeepney fare. I also walked past a lot of gay people who are prettier than me (I love my own.) And the depressing part, there were a lot of kids begging for coins or food. Life really is not fair.

So the next time I feel unlucky and ungrateful about everything, maybe I should go downtown and have reality bitch slap me in the face. Yes, there are a lot of people who are wealthier or skinnier or prettier or happier than I am but there are far more people who are poorer, heavier, uglier and sadder than me. And no, I do not have the right to look down on them or even be happy about it but it would help to feel grateful for the things we have and don't. Sure, I have moments when I wanted to have certain things and I'd feel like dying if I wouldn't have them but I wouldn't raise hell. I just wait for the time when I can finally have them. PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE, as they say. And when it comes to things like these, trust me, my patience stretches for miles.

Sometimes people forget to be grateful that they just go on hating everything about themselves and their lives. They tend to forget that even with all the problems or the lack of financial stability or material things, there are still a lot of great things that they should be grateful for.
Life.
Family.
Friends.
Hope.
Love.

And of course, GOD.

I'm no expert at life, I'm still new at this and I guess I will keep on learning, and relearning it as I go on living in this world until the day I will join Steve Jobs, este, my creator. There's no magic formula in everything. I think what we need in this world is hope, faith, love and the ability/capacity to understand why certain things have to happen. I think the failure to understand or even try to understand our situation (the whys) is the reason why we are unhappy. Not having what we want is not the reason why we are unhappy, it's our failure to understand the WHY. As I've said before, there are reasons why things happen and usually we learn the lessons at the end of everything. Just like regret, but that's another thing.

Bottomline, we should try to broaden (or change) our perspective, you'd be surprise of how selfish we people are.

I guess this blog is longer than I intended it to be. I just wanted to blog about my day but with all that I saw today, I can not help but feel grateful of the things I have. Thanksgiving is almost here and again, there are a lot of things that I am thankful for this year.

Life is beautiful if you make it to be.

xo dee